For a long season, I was drawn to him, and all I could
think about was Charlie. I was indifferent to the boys who expressed an interest in me, no matter how kind or gentlemanly they were. They seemed to embody the adage that "nice guys finish last."
The next summer Charlie announced that he didn't love me. Devastated, I asked for a hug before he left. Holding me by the arms so I couldn't move, he gave me a long, forceful kiss, then walked away.
It took me a year to get over him, but I did. I went through a series of relationships after that, some with hard breakups, but nothing like what I'd endured with Charlie.
Then I met Sam, who was utterly different from my first love: kind, decent, and openhearted. After Sam and I became engaged, Charlie heard the news and came to visit me. He told me he wanted us to start spending time together again and asked how I felt about my fiance, compared to the way I felt about him.
"I felt miserable and neurotic around you, and I feel peaceful and happy around him," I said.
Then Charlie asked for a hug.
Anonymous author
Printed in The Sun, May 2006, reader submissions. The theme was winners and losers. I tore the page out of the magazine and left the rest in Honduras for another traveler. I made up the first italicized part.
Here's another that sticks with me:
I'm a winner, lying here in my warm bed, listening to the cold wind rattling the glass door.
I'm a loser, here in this tiny rental with no room for my books and art supplies.
I'm a winner, watching sunsets color the sky above the marsh in ways my paintbrush could never capture.
I'm a loser, living alone after thirty-two years in an unhappy marriage.
I'm a winner tonight, with a sweet, soft-spoken man sleeping beside me.
I'm a loser, having been diagnosed with cancer six years ago.
I'm a winner, having survived.
I lie awak thinking of all the losers trying to sleep in the cold, windswept places on earth. I pray for them, here in my warm bed.
Paula Marston,
New Hampshire
31 July 2008
29 July 2008
"I hope your day from sunrise to sunset to right now...
...was majestic."
The lady announcing the Lotto numbers slipped this one into her segment. Yes, I was waiting to watch Family Guy.
I am training for the New Haven Road Race. For the first time I am using a training plan. I get it. These things are great. I look at the schedule and it tells me what to do. You need to do X to race faster. You need to do Y to run farther. Best of all, it tells me when to rest. I have a tendency not to rest when training myself. I'm using an intermediate plan, which may or may not be appropriate for me, that seeks to help you improve your time. I guess I will need to start caring more about time. What's my time goal for a 20K?
I went to Fleet Feet in Lincoln Square this morning to get new shoes with plenty of time before the race. I wanted to give them a second chance to fit me in the right running shoes. Last time, I left with some New Balances (a brand that usually works for me) that had far too much motion control for my feet. I've found that my feet prefer to land where they may and adjust as necessary. I also think that makes them stronger. I left with the Brooks Defyance (9B).
I was helped by Matt, who quickly discovered that I was going off to Yale Divinity School. He said he could almost guess that before I said that. I joked that it was the glow of my summer tan, but he said it was something else in me. Matt works at Fleet Feet but also lectures at Loyola in the philosophy department. He told me the story of his dissertation. Apparently, his advisor didn't like the way he went with it, as he refuted many of Nietzsche's writings in the end. His advisor tried to stand in the way of him completing. Fun ensued.
I really wanted to ask him if I could read his dissertation (and share it with a few important people in my life), but I thought it might be too forward.
Tomorrow is a speed workout. I didn't think I would enjoy doing speedwork, but I do. This long distance girl really does enjoy her sprints. They provide a great release, different from the long runs. And that's really the point of my running: release.
More Honduras pictures are up on flickr.
p.s. I have my Voodoo back. It's so beautiful. More on that later.
The lady announcing the Lotto numbers slipped this one into her segment. Yes, I was waiting to watch Family Guy.
I am training for the New Haven Road Race. For the first time I am using a training plan. I get it. These things are great. I look at the schedule and it tells me what to do. You need to do X to race faster. You need to do Y to run farther. Best of all, it tells me when to rest. I have a tendency not to rest when training myself. I'm using an intermediate plan, which may or may not be appropriate for me, that seeks to help you improve your time. I guess I will need to start caring more about time. What's my time goal for a 20K?
I went to Fleet Feet in Lincoln Square this morning to get new shoes with plenty of time before the race. I wanted to give them a second chance to fit me in the right running shoes. Last time, I left with some New Balances (a brand that usually works for me) that had far too much motion control for my feet. I've found that my feet prefer to land where they may and adjust as necessary. I also think that makes them stronger. I left with the Brooks Defyance (9B).
I was helped by Matt, who quickly discovered that I was going off to Yale Divinity School. He said he could almost guess that before I said that. I joked that it was the glow of my summer tan, but he said it was something else in me. Matt works at Fleet Feet but also lectures at Loyola in the philosophy department. He told me the story of his dissertation. Apparently, his advisor didn't like the way he went with it, as he refuted many of Nietzsche's writings in the end. His advisor tried to stand in the way of him completing. Fun ensued.
I really wanted to ask him if I could read his dissertation (and share it with a few important people in my life), but I thought it might be too forward.
Tomorrow is a speed workout. I didn't think I would enjoy doing speedwork, but I do. This long distance girl really does enjoy her sprints. They provide a great release, different from the long runs. And that's really the point of my running: release.
More Honduras pictures are up on flickr.
p.s. I have my Voodoo back. It's so beautiful. More on that later.
27 July 2008
Don't be afraid
From the Garden (Anne Sexton)
Come, my beloved,
consider the lilies.
We are of little faith.
We talk too much.
Put your mouthful of words away
and come with me to watch
the lilies open in such a field,
growing there like yachts,
slowly steering their petals
without nurses or clocks.
Let us consider the view:
a house where white clouds
decorate the muddy halls.
Oh, put away your good words
and your bad words. Spit out
your words like stones!
Come here! Come here!
Come eat my pleasant fruits.
Come, my beloved,
consider the lilies.
We are of little faith.
We talk too much.
Put your mouthful of words away
and come with me to watch
the lilies open in such a field,
growing there like yachts,
slowly steering their petals
without nurses or clocks.
Let us consider the view:
a house where white clouds
decorate the muddy halls.
Oh, put away your good words
and your bad words. Spit out
your words like stones!
Come here! Come here!
Come eat my pleasant fruits.
20 July 2008
How about this one?
What do you think? Is this understanding a cliche? Is it true? Is it possible to love another without loving yourself? Can one "schedule" love for another, being honest in such a promise? Are there different understandings of this type of love? In what ways are we supposed to love ourselves before loving another, and what type of love is the latter?
This came from postsecret.
17 July 2008
Hey - come to this:
Registration and more information
YNPN Chicago's 4th Annual Mid-Summer Social
Join YNPN Chicago for a summer tradition: our Fourth Annual Mid-Summer Social! On Monday, July 21 from 6:00 - 8:00 p.m., kick back with YNPN on Plymouth Restaurant and Bar's amazing rooftop patio. Conveniently located in the Loop, Plymouth was recently voted the "Best Spot for Playing Hooky from Work" by Metromix.Registration is $10 in advance ($12 at the door, if available) and includes appetizers, drink specials and the chance to win door prizes. Attendees will also be able to order off of Plymouth's full rooftop menu, and are welcome to stick around after 8:00 p.m. to continue networking and reconnecting with YNPN friends.
This event sold out last year, so make sure to register now! And not to worry if it rains, Plymouth also has ample indoor space.Registration and more information
16 July 2008
15 July 2008
12 July 2008
What we're supposed to do
My sister, niece, and I stayed one night in a hotel in San Juan after she was released from the hospital. The hotel staff were very nice and provided extra support and understanding since we were transporting a recently but temporarily disabled person. Their kindness made a difference to these three women who had had it rough in the hospital.
The next day, we took a taxi to the airport. The driver demonstrated how much he loved to sing and sang a few of his compositions for us. More significantly, he reminded me of one (actually...some?) of the absolutely most important things we should seek in life: show kindness to others. Some: Help to make others happy, or at least help them feel safe. Or help them grow.
He was turning left into a small intersection and there was another car waiting for him to complete the turn. At the last second, he saw a pedestrian waiting on the curb and stopped mid-intersection to wave her through. He began to tell us that he felt it was really important to let the woman cross; for her to know that this person was looking out for her and wanted her to cross safely, and he enjoyed the smile and wave she gave in return. He probably would have done it, even without the acknowledgment.
The next day, we took a taxi to the airport. The driver demonstrated how much he loved to sing and sang a few of his compositions for us. More significantly, he reminded me of one (actually...some?) of the absolutely most important things we should seek in life: show kindness to others. Some: Help to make others happy, or at least help them feel safe. Or help them grow.
He was turning left into a small intersection and there was another car waiting for him to complete the turn. At the last second, he saw a pedestrian waiting on the curb and stopped mid-intersection to wave her through. He began to tell us that he felt it was really important to let the woman cross; for her to know that this person was looking out for her and wanted her to cross safely, and he enjoyed the smile and wave she gave in return. He probably would have done it, even without the acknowledgment.
10 July 2008
I'm baking...
peanut butter cookies for Saturday. There will be fancier food and drink, but hopefully that should be reason enough for you to attend.
09 July 2008
Yo
My church is having a "Rent Party".
July 12th at 8:00pm
at 1741 N. Western Ave.
Phone: 312-399-2081
In the tradition of those who have laid the path before us, Wicker Park Grace will be holding a
Rent Party: A Skiffle of Sorts
Door Fee: $15
(free food and drink!)
Historically, to pay rising rents in neighborhoods that were filing up with people moving north in the Great Migration, folks would ask a few musician friends to play in the living rooms of their apartments, asked a few other friends to make some food and mixed up a little gin in the bathtub.
Charging admission at the door generated cash to pay the rent and a party whose celebratory energy burst from the intimate setting for all comers. Rent parties were a quintessential example of communities of people joining together to work towards mutual benefit.
Wicker Park Grace will carry on this historical tradition on July 12th with an evening of music & art, food & drink, conversation & dance.
Performing will be:
Rob Clearfield & At This Point We Don't Have the Luxury of Silence
Kate Haralson
Dave Spaulding with The Moves
Ira Gamerman w/ songs from the band, Even So
Michael Mc Bride
--------------
This is a good church that works for peace, equality, justice, and community with a deep sense of compassion and grace and divine love. Come support a loving, open-minded and open-hearted community. You know... one of those places you really love. The music will be awesome, too.
July 12th at 8:00pm
at 1741 N. Western Ave.
Phone: 312-399-2081
In the tradition of those who have laid the path before us, Wicker Park Grace will be holding a
Rent Party: A Skiffle of Sorts
Door Fee: $15
(free food and drink!)
Historically, to pay rising rents in neighborhoods that were filing up with people moving north in the Great Migration, folks would ask a few musician friends to play in the living rooms of their apartments, asked a few other friends to make some food and mixed up a little gin in the bathtub.
Charging admission at the door generated cash to pay the rent and a party whose celebratory energy burst from the intimate setting for all comers. Rent parties were a quintessential example of communities of people joining together to work towards mutual benefit.
Wicker Park Grace will carry on this historical tradition on July 12th with an evening of music & art, food & drink, conversation & dance.
Performing will be:
Rob Clearfield & At This Point We Don't Have the Luxury of Silence
Kate Haralson
Dave Spaulding with The Moves
Ira Gamerman w/ songs from the band, Even So
Michael Mc Bride
--------------
This is a good church that works for peace, equality, justice, and community with a deep sense of compassion and grace and divine love. Come support a loving, open-minded and open-hearted community. You know... one of those places you really love. The music will be awesome, too.
06 July 2008
Sneaking in San Juan
I recently spent a few days in lovely Puerto Rico. La Isla del Encanto offers beautiful beaches, rich culture, friendly people, and stimulating nightlife. Yay, tropics.
San Juan also features the Caribbean's primary trauma center at the Centro Medico, which is where my sister, my niece, her dad and I spent our time. Our main activity was tending to my niece, who was there for some injuries.
Patients are only supposed to have one visitor, except during visitor hours. Well, we weren't really going to abide by that rule, so we found creative ways to stick around her. All the hotels charged touristy prices and were about a $20 cab ride away, so we also had to find ways and places to sleep until she was released. Apparently you are free to sleep outside in the hallways but not inside (a door separates OK from not OK). My best night's sleep was on a bench outside the operating room. Otherwise, I did my best to sweet-talk the guards into letting us stay with my niece and/or sleep near her. Pretty successfully, I might add. Most of the people we met were extremely nice (except the ER staff had a tougher time showing that).
For some reason, I brought my camera, so here are some shots of the San Juan Centro Medico and our thrilling say there:
Waiting, waiting, waiting for her surgery to finish:
Outside the O.R.:
Please, please let me sleep:
We stayed in a hotel on the last night, after my niece was discharged. I spent less than a day outside of the Centro Medico.
Natural complements:
San Juan also features the Caribbean's primary trauma center at the Centro Medico, which is where my sister, my niece, her dad and I spent our time. Our main activity was tending to my niece, who was there for some injuries.
Patients are only supposed to have one visitor, except during visitor hours. Well, we weren't really going to abide by that rule, so we found creative ways to stick around her. All the hotels charged touristy prices and were about a $20 cab ride away, so we also had to find ways and places to sleep until she was released. Apparently you are free to sleep outside in the hallways but not inside (a door separates OK from not OK). My best night's sleep was on a bench outside the operating room. Otherwise, I did my best to sweet-talk the guards into letting us stay with my niece and/or sleep near her. Pretty successfully, I might add. Most of the people we met were extremely nice (except the ER staff had a tougher time showing that).
For some reason, I brought my camera, so here are some shots of the San Juan Centro Medico and our thrilling say there:
Waiting, waiting, waiting for her surgery to finish:
Outside the O.R.:
Please, please let me sleep:
We stayed in a hotel on the last night, after my niece was discharged. I spent less than a day outside of the Centro Medico.
Natural complements:
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